I wanted to be... a lumberjack!

Leaping from tree to tree, as they float down
the mighty rivers of British Columbia.
The Giant Redwood.
The Larch.
The Fir!
The mighty Scots Pine!
The lofty flowering Cherry!
The plucky little Apsen!
The limping Roo tree of Nigeria.
The towering Wattle of Aldershot!
The Maidenhead Weeping Water Plant!
The naughty Leicestershire Flashing Oak!
The flatulent Elm of West Ruislip!
The Quercus Maximus Bamber Gascoigni!
The Epigillus!
The Barter Hughius Greenus!
With my best buddy by my side,
We'd sing! Sing! Sing!

I'm a lumberjack
And I'm okay
I sleep all night
And I work all day

He's a lumberjack
And he's okay
He sleeps all night
And he works all day

I cut down trees
I eat my lunch
I go to the lavatory
On Wednesdays I go shopping
And have buttered scones for tea

He cuts down trees
He eats his lunch
He goes to the lavatory
On Wednesdays he goes shopping
And has buttered scones for tea
He's a lumberjack
And he's okay
He sleeps all night
And he works all day

I cut down trees
I skip and jump
I like to press wild flowers
I put on women's clothing
And hang around in bars

He cuts down trees
He skips and jumps
He likes to press wild flowers
He puts on women's clothing
And hangs around in bars
He's a lumberjack
And he's okay
He sleeps all night
And he works all day

I cut down trees
I wear high heels
Suspendies and a bra
I wish I'd been a girly
Just like my dear pa-pa

He cuts down trees
He wears high heels?
Suspendies ... and a bra?

He's a lumberjack
And he's OKAY
He sleeps all night
And he works all day

I wish I'd been a girlie, just like my dear Papa!